Time-In Versus Time-Out

A Positive and Compassionate Alternative to Punishment

© Sara McGrath

Time-In, Scott Liddell
Time-in is the new time-out. Parents and caregivers seeking positive and compassionate alternatives to harsher forms of discipline are turning from time-outs to time-ins.

As were time-outs before them, time-ins are promoted as a more effective tool for managing the undesired behaviors of young children. Both methods claim to help children calm down in the face of difficult situations, but what makes time-in different from time-out?

What Makes Time-In Different From Time-Out?

Time-In

Time-Out

Young children regard themselves through the eyes of their caregivers. Giving time-in in response to unwanted behavior shows the child that the adult's love and care of the child is unshakable. It shows the child that the adult wants to help the child feel better.

Time-outs, on the other hand, perhaps especially those given names such as the "naughty chair," carry the potential to damage the relationship between adult and child and to negatively affect the child's self-esteem. A child with poor self-esteem, who feels unsupported or unloved, is less likely to practice mutually desirable behavior in the long term than one who feels secure in his or her self and relationship to caregivers.

Parents and caregivers practicing time-in together with children help those children develop emotional intelligence, relationship skills, increased self-awareness and self-determination, and positive self-esteem. These practices promote long-term success in maintaining and regaining balance in the face of difficult situations. Time-ins provide a more effective long-term solution to stopping undesired behavior by providing children with the skills they need to solve their problems and to work together with others toward collective well-being.

For more information on time-ins, see Scott Noelle's four-part series beginning with Time-In.


The copyright of the article Time-In Versus Time-Out in Peaceful Parenting is owned by Sara McGrath. Permission to republish Time-In Versus Time-Out in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.


Time-In, Scott Liddell
       



Post this Article to facebook Add this Article to del.icio.us! Digg this Article furl this Article Add this Article to Reddit Add this Article to Technorati Add this Article to Newsvine Add this Article to Windows Live Add this Article to Yahoo Add this Article to StumbleUpon Add this Article to BlinkLists Add this Article to Spurl Add this Article to Google Add this Article to Ask Add this Article to Squidoo