1. Change your Perspective – it’s not about you, it’s about them!
How you behave now will impact them for their lives. Think about three things: what you remember your childhood like, how you would like to remember your child’s childhood, and how you think your child will remember her childhood.
2. Changing the Rules to Work for You.
If they aren’t hurting themselves, others or things, what’s the harm? Rules of the house are of paramount importance. But if the rules aren’t working, they can always be changed. Think about your house rules and see if they’re working well, or if they’re creating more work and grief in your house.
Here’s an example to illustrate:
Imagine one of your house rules is that the kids cannot bring toys out of their room. They are not following this rule and you are constantly picking up their stuff and nagging. You feel frustrated because they’re not listening. You spend a lot of time and energy on this argument. Ask the question, “is this hurting them, others, or things?” Then ask, “is this rule working for us?” Think of alternatives – maybe the kids could bring three toys out at a time. When they are ready to play with other toys, they have to first put the others away. Or maybe they could bring out their toys and clean them up before lunch and dinner. There are always solutions – we just have to be willing to change the rules now and then.
3. Children are Meant to be Loud.
Screaming and running actually encourages brain development. That’s why recess is so important in the younger school grades. Always stifling screaming, laughing and loud noises can have negative effects.
4. Model the Behaviour you Desire.
If you want your little one to be calm, you have to be calm. If you want your little one to have fun, you need to be having fun.
5. Have High Expectations.
No matter who your child is, it’s important to expect success from them. This will show that you have confidence in them and help them believe they are smart and worthy. On the flipside of this, be careful not to have unrealistic expectations. Putting pressure on our children can have a damaging effect if they can’t measure up.
6. Enjoy your Children and Have Fun.
Encourage them. Give them love and support. They are not little for long and your loving interactions with them now build the basis for a fulfillin life. Again, think about what you want to remember and what you want your children to remember.
