Peace between siblings is a commodity. Many parents are seeking help to stop sibling rivalry. It can be a struggle to obtain. Sibling rivalry is simply the competition between siblings, which is quite commonplace. According to a Jan. 2, 2008 Science Daily article, “Parents Show Bias In Sibling Rivalry, Says Study,” families are harmonious to an extent, but “it's not to say that families are not without conflict, especially if the resources cannot be divided equitably."
These resources of time, parental attention, privileges, and material possessions are what many sibling squabbles are about. There are many practical ways to encourage peace between siblings.
Make Each Child Feel Special
One of the basic causes of sibling rivalry is that children compare themselves to each other, which results in low self-esteem. Help each child feel special and appreciated. Never compare kids to each other. This can be very detrimental to a child’s well being.
In order to foster a sense of specialness, try to set aside time for each child individually. Many parents lack a lot free time, but just a half an hour can make a huge difference. This is a prime time to really listen to the child, giving him the much needed opportunity to simply be himself. It’s not only a relationship booster for the parent and child, but also promotes a child’s sense of autonomy.
Set Family Guidelines and Rules
Many sibling fights occur because of blurry rules and guidelines. For example, arguments may occur over who gets to sit in the front seat on trips, who gets the first shower, and who has garbage duty. Preventive measures are best suited in these kinds of situations. Set nonnegotiable rules on chores, giving everyone their fair share on specified days. Create a schedule for front seats and shower privileges. When these small hassles are removed, there are few occasions for squabbles.
Create Fun Family Memories
If brothers and sisters have a storehouse of fun family times together, they are less likely to have a desire to argue. A strong sense of closeness can be achieved as they build happy memories. Fun day trips, family game night, long walks as a family, and going camping together are just a few ways to encourage peace between siblings. If siblings have funny, shared moments fresh in their memories, they are more likely to try to avoid quarrels with each other.
Seek Professional Family Counseling
If positive results have not been achieved after efforts to calm sibling rivalry have been made, seek family counseling. If the fighting is excessive or uncontrollable, seeing a qualified counselor for therapy could help put a family on the path to peace.
Resource:
Therapist Locator is a resource to help find local family therapists.
 |
